I'm Just a Kid
by Unique Art
Summary: Malik isn't a normal kid. He is so troubled, and haunted by his past. And sometimes...he needs to vent. After all, he is just a kid. One-shot


I was searching YouTube, and I came across this one video about Malik. It was a tribute to him with the song "I'm Just a Kid" by Simple Plan. It gave me an idea for a story! It fit him so well, and it touched me. This is my first ever Malik-centric fic, so I hope I got his character right. He is so unique, and he's fun to play around with in stories.

I hope you guys like it. If anything is odd about him, or his past, feel free to tell me. I'm inspired to write more for him, maybe hanging out with Bakura. Oh, and he isn't really going out with the albino here, though it may sound like that...use your imagination. Ha!

DISCLAIMER:I don't own a thing. There's hardly even a plot, anyway...

**-0-0-0-0-**

_Whats another night all alone?  
When your spending every day on your own  
And here it goes...  
I'm just a kid and life is a nightmare  
I'm just a kid and I know that its not fair  
Nobody cares cause I'm alone and the world  
Is havin more fun then me_

**-0-0-0-0-**

I'm alone.

All alone.

That is, if you don't count the crazy voice in my head. I guess he keeps me company, if you think "company" means scrowling mentally at you, and making sharp comments about everything. And torturing you, sometimes making you do things against your will, and "helping" you relive your anger, pain, and most horrible moments.

Sure, I have Ishizu and Odion. They helped me through so much, and I love them both dearly. But what would they understand? They have no idea what I went through, even after that night. Sure, they see the scars on my back, and heard my wails of terror the chilly Egyptian night. They sympathized, and comforted me more than they'll ever know. But they have no idea what I felt when my father looked in my tear-filled eyes, and_ smiled_ at me.

And, though I'd never admit it, it hurt me more than the things they did to my body, in a way. I used to take pride in being his son, even in the slightest bit. Then, I only felt disgust. And anger. Pain. His smile scared me to death. Scared me to the point of horror. It's a haunting memory that plagues my thoughts at night.

Every. Night.

Why don't I hang out with Yugi, and his little group?

Well, despite the fact my dark side would somehow find a way to murder me, I still really haven't forgiven the Pharaoh. To see him gives my hatred - not to mention crazy half - a drive to hurt him. Make him pay. And I can't risk that right now, I guess. I can't really trust myself with him, the person I still hate. Not hate to the point where I want him to suffer a bloody death, but definitely not enough to tolerate him

And I doubt they trust me. After what I did to them, I guess I can't blame them. They still fear me, and my blood-thirsty yami. Oh sure, they helped me in the beginning, and tried to make me feel welcome. The little runt was kinda nice, but I couldn't warm up to him. I saw too much of the Pharaoh in his eyes.

The girl, and two others? Please! They were nervous to get near me. But they tried, at least in the beginning, and I guess I feel a little grateful for that. But then, they slowly started to drift away, leaving me on my own. Again.

And then there's Bakura, I guess. I mean, he's kinda funny, and he's an amusing thief. But, he doesn't get me at all. He has no idea what pain I've felt. Oh, sure, he had his own pain, but never mine. He mocks me, too. It doesn't hurt, or make me upset or anything, but it gets a little old. And, when he gets bored with using me and my money, he goes on to another poor, unfortunate soul that's pathetic enough to be with him.

Ryou's an okay kid. He's just so messed up, from his yami and all. But hey, aren't we all? I can talk to him a bit, but I know deep down Bakura's listening too. Ryou's been a big help through a few things. I guess he's just to quiet to hang out with me a bunch. I'm surprised he hasn't shunned himself from me, considering what I did at Battle City, but I guess he can relate, in his own way.

Ra, my life sounds like a piece of crap, huh?

And, in a way, it was. I lived in a hole in the ground, and was hidden from the world. Had my whole young life devoted to one thing:The Pharaoh. Then, when I was still a kid, I had his remains burned into my back. That's when Marik was born! Yeah, a day to celebrate, huh? The day my hate and anger was made real, and took control of me, making me a power hungry freak that controlled people.

It was pretty messed up.

And, the sad part is, I used my whole childhood that way. I was a monster! I feel like I've lived my whole life; seen it all; done it all. Feels like I should be done!

And I'm only a mere seventeen years of age.

I'm only a kid, and I've been tortured, driven crazy, hateful, murdered, been uncaring, manipulated, turned cruel, been controlled, been controll_ing_, turned evil, deceived people, been hurt beyond understanding, and torn into many pieces.

I bet any other kid lived a normal life! Mine has been so shredded with tragedy, I hardly remember any of it. It's all just a big blur of confusion and blind rage.

I try to be normal. I try my best! I try to go to movies with Bakura or Ryou, laugh and pig out, play at the arcade, and goof off. I'm even in high school! But I never feel as if I belong. I feel like I'm watching a happy movie from the outside, away from my peers. I feel like they only see the mask of a tall, tan Egyptian with soft, sandy blond hair and violet eyes. They don't see the scared, lonely little boy behind that cool, collected mask.

They don't see me.

I wish they could see. See my true feelings! Not my stupid mask. I don't want to stay together, and be calm. I wanna scream! Fall! Crumble to the floor. I want to show my broken soul to the world; I wanna make them understand. Make them know. Make them see!

But no. I can't.

Ishizu and Odion. They are so happy with me! They are relieved and overjoyed I'm doing well in school, and staying away from trouble (When I'm not with Bakura, of course). They are so supportive...I know I should talk to them, but I can't. I don't want to hurt them, and bring up tearful memories of our past. As Ishizu says, it's behind us now.

And my yami...I hear his voice constantly. He infuriates me! I have to control my every move, just so I don't blow up at him during school. It's like I'm never free! Never able to just let go entirely...He'll always be there, just like the smile of my father, and the taunts of Bakura. Like the scars on my back, and my hatred for the Pharaoh. They can't fade with time; they won't just disappear. They'll stay with me for the rest of my life, which could be a long time, considering how young I am.

**-0-0-0-0-**

_I'm all alone...  
Tonight  
Nobody cares...  
Tonight  
Cuz I'm just a kid_

**-0-0-0-0-**

Thank you for listening to me. I really needed to let it all, you know? I'll see you next week, same time, okay? Thanks, again. You're the only one I can really talk to.

_I walk outside, and see Ryou standing there. He waves a bit, and I walk over to him._

_"So, Malik, how was therapy?"_

**-0-0-0-0-**

Was the ending okay? It was random, and spur of the moment. I don't know where it came from...Hmm...anyway, give me your thoughts on this long drabble of oddness. Thanks for your help!

Unique Art


End file.
